Introduction

After the Easter Octave I returned to my Lent Book, St Paul’s letter to the Romans, for my lectio, reading it this time in the RSV translation in a study bible which gives lots of insight into the context and meaning of St Paul’s words and message. Looking back, I found that I was once again drawn to many of the same passages and verses as I had been during my Lent readings. However, about a week ago I moved on to St Paul’s letter to the Ephesians. I chose this for two reasons: it is my favourite of all of St Paul’s epistles and it is used as our Midday Office reading for part of Eastertide.

Lectio

I have been reading this letter for a week and have not yet progressed beyond the first chapter. This can happen in lectio – the text draws us into prayer and we spend much time in blessed wondering and pondering, and don’t need to move on through the words very much as we remain focussed on God.

After a short greeting, Ephesians I moves quickly into a rich canticle celebrating the mystery of salvation. The phrases I was drawn to include those which speak to me of belonging to God:

Before the world was made, he chose us, chose us in Christ… (1: 4).

and

And it is in [Christ] that we were claimed as God’s own, chosen from the beginning (1: 11).

It is the word ‘chosen’ that stands out for me here. I find it so amazing to think that God knew something of me, knew so many possibilities for me, of what I could be, good and bad, before he ever made me. He knew of how I could turn out, and in that knowledge, he went ahead and made me.

This brings to mind, too, passages from the Old Testament, particularly

“Before I formed you in the womb, I knew you,
and before you were born, I consecrated you;
I appointed you a prophet to the nations.” (Jeremiah 1:5)

and

Your eyes saw my unformed substance;
in your book were written, every one of them,
the days that were formed for me,
when as yet there was none of them. (Psalm 139:16)

I think it is God’s desire for me that shines out here. It comes both in acceptance – he knew of the me with all my faults and struggles – and chose to create me so he could love me and I him – and also it comes in potential – he saw a really wonderful version of me – that I can become. This calls to mind the wisdom of the Cistercian monastic writer, Thomas Merton, who saw the search for one’s true identity as a path on the road to life:

For me to be a saint means to be myself. Therefore, the problem of sanctity and salvation is in fact the problem of finding out who I am and of discovering my true self. ‘New Seeds of Contemplation’ (1962)

God loves me as I am, but there is a true and deep self that I am on the journey to discover, that, if I allow it, God will form me into that person. Yet all the time I am loved for what I am now.

Prayer

O God, who called and chose us before we were born, before we were formed in the womb, hold us ever in your love and give us grace to realise and live out in our lives the deep and wonderful dreams you have for us, and so come to live ever more fully the Paschal mystery of your Christ.